Busy, busy

We're still working on cleaning up and reorganizing our office. Kitty is quite interested in helping out with this project. Here's Tulip helping Evie sort some receipts.

"2007s go in here, Mama."

I found something new!

Not that every other cat isn't, but Tulip is extremely curious. Even with no eyes, she finds her way into everything. We had this collapsible bag sitting in the living room, and kitty though it would be fun to get in it. That is, until it ate her!

Hey guys! Look what I found!


Uh ooooh...


Oh noooooooes! It's eating me!


Only foolin'! I'm right here.


Is that not the cutest thing you've ever seen?

Caught in the act

Last weekend Eve and I were in the office talking. Tulip Kitty was bored because it was raining, and she couldn't go out on the deck. Instead, she jumped up on the bed and started attacking Violet. I told you she's a bully! We have evidence!

My eye!

Tulip tried her best to give me a black eye this morning. She was curled up next to me when the alarm went off. She stretched and purred while I petted her. Then I sat up, which intimidated her because she could feel me looming over her. So of course she threw herself at me, claws and fangs out. Her nose hit me right in the eye full force. All I saw was a bright flash, followed by throbbing pain. I couldn’t even open that eye for a few minutes to see if it was okay. It’s a little bloodshot, but not too puffy now. Happy Friday!

Tulip realized right away what she had done. She sat down on the end of the bed with a pitiful look on her face. I was so pissed off initially that I left her sitting there. Once I decided I was going to live, I went out to the kitchen to make coffee. Kitty came out and rubbed up against my leg, looking for some approval. She got a pet and some breakfast, but she wasn’t very interested in eating.

While I sat and drank my coffee, she was still pretty sheepish. I finally coaxed her over to me and gave her another pet. Kitty was sorry! She curled up at my feet and watched the news with me while I finished my coffee.

I know that Tulip does most of the crazy things she does because she can’t see. I suspect that she’s used to being punked by the other cats she used to live with, so she’s very defensive unless she’s 200% sure who is touching her (or even near her sometimes) and why. But did I really need a punch in the eye at 5:30 in the morning?

Naughty girl

On Saturday I was cleaning the bathroom. I moved Tulip's litterbox out to the main part of the bathroom while I cleaned, because it was in my way. As I was working away, I noticed a scratch, scratch, scratch and the tell-tale tssssss of fine grains kitty litter bouncing on the floor. I looked over and watched as Tulip sat outside her litterbox and flung kitty litter all over the place. She'd flick it with her paw onto the floor. Then she'd cock her head to the side and listen with that goofy kitty smile on her face. Apparently she liked the sound of it hitting the floor. She thought it was great fun. Punk!

*ting* *ting* *ting*

*ting* *ting* *ting* *ting* *slash* *splash*

Know what that sound is? That's Tulip playing in her water dish. Lately kitty has been messing with her water in order to get some attention. She splashes around in it. If that doesn't get Eve or I to come, she whacks the bowl until she knocks it over and spills water everywhere. There are little, wet footprints all over the place, and water droplets all over the floor, cabinets, fridge. Punk! I'm thinking about eating her.

I told Eve to yell at her when she does it. So now I hear "KITTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH!!!!" followed by "MMMBRRRRRT?" followed by some floor mopping, several times a day. It's a lot like how I imagine a mental hospital to be.

No rest for the wicked

I think Tulip and Eve were determined to not let me sleep last night. I went to bed before everyone else. I was dreaming away when the rest of the crew piled into bed. Kitty and Eve started playing with the birdie, which would have been cute if it weren't 2:00 in the morning. Of course I immediately yelled at them, so we all went to sleep.

Along comes 4 AM and Tulip is messing around on Eve's nightstand. She's batting the lip balm around. She's playing with the pull-chain on the lamp. She's walking around on top of the CD player. She's clawing at the baskets on the shelf below her. This is met with, "RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHRRRRRRRRRRRRR*#$@!!" from me. So Eve shoos her off the nightstand.

Off the nightstand she comes, and over onto me. I'm laying on my side, so she proceeds to do a wobbly balancing act on my hip. For like 5 minutes. She finally falls off and decides it's time to investigate my nightstand now. Ting, ting, ting, creeeeek, bang, scratch, scratch, scratch, scratch, ting, ting, ting, ting, ting, ting, thud.

"KITTY!!!!!"

Tulip comes back onto the bed where she discovers the birdie which Eve had hidden under the covers. Tap, tap, tap, scratch, om, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom...

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!"

*silence*

Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. Oh look. Time to get up. *sigh*

Short but sweet

I wouldn't normally post 2 videos in a day, but this one cracked me up for some reason. Just three brief seconds of kitty punkiness, popping out from behind the couch.

Bed wrassler

Here's the little Punkinator wrassling with her kitty bed. This seems to be her new sport these days. She flips the thing over on top of herself and bites and kicks it.

What I love the most about Tulip kitty is how sweet and gentle she is...

Blind TV

Last night after I had just climbed into bed I was treated to, "The cat is behind the TV" coming from the other room. Our craptastic TV sits in a low cutout in the living room wall. The TV is quite a bit smaller than the cutout, so there are a few DVDs, some books and assorted other crap filling in the space around it. My little fur angel decided it would be fun to cram herself through the remaining tiny space to get up in the shelf behind the TV. Because apparently that's how blind cats watch TV. From behind. By the time I got back out of bed and out to the living room she was casually strolling back out from under the TV. Punk!

This morning as I was drinking my coffee, she decided she'd give it another try. So Eve got to start off her day by hearing me yell, "Tu! Get outta there! KITTY!!!!" And so we started another fun-filled day.

Kitty gone wild

Man, Tulip was wild this morning! Come to think of it, she was pretty wild last night too. She was squawking and running around the bedroom. She was batting Pom around under the bed. On the bed, off the bed, on the bed. Thank god she finally settled down.

This morning she was at it again. MREEEEOOOOOOOOW! She was spinning herself around on the bed, pouncing on nothing. I finally tossed Tiggy Tiger to her so I wouldn't get attacked. She grabbed him and flipped herself over, right off the bed. Take it easy girl! We don't need a visit to Dr. Cote.

Messing with Bob - sequel

Eve didn't believe me that Tulip was getting up every morning to mess with Bob. I can't imagine how Eve slept through kitty crinkling the plastic and me yelling at her. In any case, I told Eve I would wake her up so she could join the festivities the next morning.

Sure enough, Tulip kitty was at it the next morning.

"Evie. Tulip's messing with Bob."

"Whaaaa?"

"Tulip's messing with Bob."

"Is that what that was? I thought that was part of my dream. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz..."

And so I shooed kitty away from Bob for the millionth time. She jumped up on the bed with a chirp, got a pet, then left again. As soon as I dozed off, I could hear weird scratchy noises.

"Evie. What the F is Tulip doing now?"

"Huh?"

"Don't you hear that? What the hell is she doing?"

"She's standing on her back legs, feeling around on top of the dresser."

When kitty heard me sit up, she ran off. She knows I'm going to eat her soon.

When I got up on the morning, I happened to notice a new surprise on the dresser. Teeny, tiny claw marks all along the front edge. Someone could just barely reach and was trying to grab whatever she could find up there. You know what's up there, Tu? A knuckle sandwich.

Messing with Bob

Tulip has been so naughty the last few mornings. Around 3:30 AM she gets up, goes over to Bob (our ficus tree), and starts crinkling the plastic bag we put on there to keep her out of the plant. It wakes me up, I scold her, she runs away, I lay down, she starts in all over again. One of these days I'm going to eat her for breakfast.

This morning, after playing that game for almost an hour she started making all kinds of noise. She was up on my nightstand walking around and bumping into things. Kitty! It's sleep time! I scolded her again, so she finally came back on the bed and flopped down next to me (complete with one of her little disgusted sighs). She went to sleep just in time for the alarm clock to go off. And yes, yes I did wake her up. How's that, kitty?

I love Tulip.

I feel like chicken tonight

I was at my office yesterday doing homework for most of the day. On my way home I decided to grab a roasted chicken for dinner. Miss Tulip was quite interested in sampling the chicken when we sat down to eat. I didn't realize a cat could move her nose so much. She was sniffing with all her little kitty might. I don't really believe in feeding pets people food, so I wasn't going to give her any. I think she knew that. After we finished eating, I was pulling the rest of the meat off of the chicken carcass when I accidentally dropped a piece on the floor. Tulip was running around in circles, trying to find that piece of chicken. She was going crazy! She could smell it, but obviously couldn't see where it was. I couldn't take it any more, so I pointed her to it. She absolutely inhaled it. Kitty want chicken!

I swear she willed me to drop that piece of chicken...

Gross!

Last night I was sitting at the table doing homework. I heard Tulip building a sandcastle in the litterbox. It seemed like she was digging in there for an hour. Finally she came out of the bathroom. She zoomed around, then came up short to a screeching halt. Then she did it again, and again. I noticed that I kept hearing this weird little thumping noise every time she did it.

I finally saw her zoom past and noticed a little turd hanging from a piece of my hair, which was hanging out of her butt. Every time she stopped short, the little turd swung and bounced off the floor. Now seriously. Is this what I need? I had to get Eve to help me round her up so I could pull the damn thing off. It was just so goddamn gross. Then I spent the next 20 minutes inspecting the floor for turd marks. Happy Halloween to you too, kitty!

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Oh my God, Tulip kitty was wild last night. I had a ton of homework to do and she was going absolutely nuts. She was squeaking and chirping all night. She was up and down off the furniture. She was up and down the stairs. She was hanging off the side of her green chair. JEEZ! I was sitting at the dining table trying to read and she kept getting up in the chair oppostite of me. The chair was pushed all the way in, but the curved back allowed her to poke her head up above the table. She kept poking her head up and reaching across the table with her paws, looking for something to swipe off the table. I have to laugh because it was pretty cute, but she was drving me nuts. It took me hours to finish my homework, and I can hardly name one thing I read because I was so distracted. Punk!

Ornery

Man, Tulip kitty was ornery this morning! First of all, she heard Eve's alarm go off, so she came into the bedroom. Then she decided it was time to clear off the shelf of my nightstand. She woke me up by dropping my watch onto the floor, so I scolded her. After that she jumped up onto the bed for some pets, then almost immediately bit me. She plopped herself down on the bed, leaning up against me so I would be tempted to touch her. Every time I did, she bit me again. What a brat! I hope she's in a better mood when I get home tonight!

Kitty punk

Here's my sweet angel, Tulip kitty, messing with me. I was just minding my business, flipping through a magazine when she started in. Eve grabbed the camera and caught the best of it on video. Man, it's a tough crowd around here! It's a good thing I have a sense of humor.

And now, When Punks Attack...

Splish splash I was making a mess

Last night Eve could hear splashing in the kitchen. She went out there and caught Tulip kitty playing in her water bowl. There was water on the walls, the floor, kitty's place mat, everywhere. She was reaching in there with her paws and flinging water all over the place. Punk!

This morning while I was in the shower I could hear bowls clanking together. Eve caught her at it again. This time she spilled her water bowl all over the floor. Kitty needs a birdbath now?

Nails on the chalkboard

Tulip kitty has a really weird, new habit. She walks right up to the wall, reaches up, and drags her claws lightly across it. It sounds just like fingernails on a chalkboard.

I know. I just got the chills too.

I have no idea why she likes to do this, but she does it all the time now. This started maybe a couple of months ago. The funny thing is that she’ll do it really quickly and sneaky-like. She’ll be walking down the hallway and suddenly reach up and make a quick screech on the wall, then keep going like nothing happened. Or she’ll be sitting close to the wall with her back turned to it, then suddenly reach over and SCREEEECH. Then she sits there looking innocent. It’s kind of cute, in a sick sort of way. I think she’s doing it just to mess with us.